Our startup 3 years in is growing, building products, finding better fit, and winning contracts. I lead technical direction and product development. My cofounder is the face getting money and promoting the business while I focus more internally. I still meet with customers and businesses to form partnerships. Some of which are our largest source of revenue. This has worked. Until it hasn't as more money has been coming in.

They tried to hire their spouse and I requested a proper process or documentation so it was defensible to the board. I intentionally did not go to the other board members so there was no perception of discord. Ultimately, the cofounder agreed and their spouse then decided to drop out and not join the company. My cofounder even agreed their spouse joining would have ruined the company. Since then, things have been strained.

The CEO is also committing to some fairly high CAPEX in things we don't own without any formal board approval. I have raised concerns only for my cofounder to get angry and dismiss me telling me to "stay in my lane." These CAPEX items have caused us to move multiple times and create a lot of chaos and questions from the staff which go unaddressed. Or, worse -- we are unable to acquire the things we need to be successful with those purchases being blocked for more "vanity" purchases like repainting the outside of our building multiple times. Additionally, we have another executive that is ineffective (my observation, and their subordinates) but is loyal to my cofounder. However they were loyal to me when their job was threatened by the spouse.

Recently I was hit by a surprise meeting including one board member and placed on paid leave with no contact to employees. They also requested I relocate back to the state I came from prior to relocating for the business. I stated this wasn't anything I wanted, which surprised the board member. I have been complying as I figure out next steps. Employees are confused and I have been reassuring them. I am contemplating a letter or discussion with the other board members to get some truth/other perspective out and hopefully work through this with some legal guidance.

Any advice? I am leaning towards an approach where I exit and advise because I don't think I can recover the business long term from the chaos unless I get a new leadership team with me.